The Perfect Place
by Dreamsparkle
Summary: Among Zombieland Columbus and Tallahassee find the perfect place to stay awhile. Slash.


So for the meantime they had decided to settle in a little theatre in Wyoming. The owner, whose bones were once rotting in the basement but were now buried outside, had once been one of those nut jobs who had known the end of the world was coming and had planned for every eventuality. The end though had come and instead of using all his perfectly planned methods of surviving the apocalypse, he had instead committed suicide with a box of sleeping pills.

The theatre also had a huge supply of, to Tallahassee's glee, Twinkies all nice and packed in a freezer. Between those and the numerous locks on all the doors the place was perfect. Tallahassee had been about to start shooting at the sky again and when Columbus had tried to stop him, Tallahassee had picked him up and kissed him. The older man hadn't thought much of it but Columbus had blushed for ages.

On another completely different note, old habits seem to die hard when Wichita and Little Rock had once again stolen their car, weapons and escalating to their clothes so they wouldn't be followed. Tallahassee had not been amused and even he had to write in his tiny little book of rules, don't trust pretty female con artists.

He didn't think he would find another pretty girl out here in Zombieland that would be even mildly interested in him but it was always worth a note when he'd almost gotten eaten going into a shop naked and with only a crowbar he'd picked off the street for protection. He had been looking for some clothes for him and Tallahassee who covered up with his cowboy hat the girls had let him keep for sentimental reasons.

Not that Columbus could blame them. Taking Tallahassee's cowboy hat would have been cruel even in Zombieland, along with if they had taken his wallet with the pictures of his son. However since they hadn't Tallahassee had decided not to follow them and had drove in the opposite direction in their new SUV, the 3 bold on the side.

"You're thinking too much again, spitfuck."Tallahassee complained. There was this cool second floor attic where they could pull up the ladders so they were triply safe. No zombie could climb. They were both trying to sleep and had dragged mattresses up here which was exhausting but worth the comfort. He still couldn't sleep though.

Tallahassee had kissed him and he was pretty sure he'd caught Tallahassee looking at him when they'd both been naked. He was trying to work out whether the older man was attracted to him and how he'd feel if he was. Tallahassee though punched him in the arm hard and he yelped in pain. "I told you to stop thinking."

Rubbing his arm and muttering curses Columbus finally got the courage to ask. "Tallahassee, do you like me?"

"Wow, you really are a little bitch aren't you?" Tallahassee joked.

"No, I mean..."

"I swear to god above if you say like, like I'm gonna throw you out that window without opening it." Tallahassee growled and Columbus swallowed hard. He'd gotten that totally wrong then. Not only was he not gay but he seemed to be a homophobe. He should really have expected it with Tallahassee being a red neck that had had a kid.

He suddenly realised that if Tallahassee hated him now he could be as good as dead, or even worse he might end up alone again. He didn't want that to happen, he didn't think he could handle that. Him panicking silently was apparently even louder than him thinking loudly as Tallahassee sighed and made his way across the room.

"Hey," Columbus heard him whisper more gently than he'd ever heard before. He moved Columbus to give him room to lay down next to him. Columbus was surprised when Tallahassee kissed him in one long chaste kiss. He looked at the older man surprised."Now stop being a little bitch and go to sleep. We have a long day watching movies and eating Twinkies tomorrow so you better not ruin it with your whiny talk okay?!"

Columbus grinned and nodded but despite Tallahassee's macho act he wasn't the one who was cuddling the other in the end.


End file.
